With Valentine’s Day approaching quickly, you may shower others with love and gifts. Here is a reminder to give yourself some love … since self-love could be the best gift to give to yourself.
Self-love is unique to each of us; What it means to me will be completely different from what it means to you. And while our doubts and criticisms are entirely our own, there are techniques we can use to build and nurture self-acceptance, self-compassion, and ultimately self-love for ourselves.
Here are two simple techniques you can indulge in this Valentine’s Day to help build self-love:
Write yourself a thank you letter, list all the things that you appreciate, and are thankful for yourself. Some ideas to get you started – start by thanking your body…. Your legs that lead you from A to B, your arms that you can use to hug your loved ones, your fingers that tap and send a message to a friend, your ears that hear and record those wonderful sounds and songs of your favorite artists. Your eyes that see the outside world, the sky, the trees, the grass.
You understand my drift.
Now it may feel silly at first, but give it a try because the rewards are well worth it.
When you practice this technique, some incredible things will happen to you. First, when we express gratitude, we get a surge in the hormone DOPAMINE. Simply taking stock of everything you are grateful for will trigger a surge of this incredible feel-good hormone. Imagine giving a big hug to your entire body and system and taking a shower to feel good about yourself. And by regularly stopping and taking a moment to realize and appreciate how amazing you and your body are, you are creating a new way of thinking.
The process of getting paper to paper and writing is inextricably linked with learning. 1. As you write all the elements of yourself that you value, learn to love yourself and see yourself in a new, more positive light.
The Mindology app also has a gratitude journal that you can download for free to get the feel good hormones pumping.
Language is strong for our psyche and our physiology. Imagine a friend saying nice, sweet words to you against an angry driver on the road who shouts insults and anger on the road – first scenario: you feel good, you are calm, your body is calm, you You may even smile and have a warm, blurry feeling inside, while in the second scenario your heart is pounding, your palms are sweaty, your blood pressure is rising – you are stressed.
You may not realize it, but words actually have a huge impact on your daily mood. Neuroscientist Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett has studied the effects words have on us and has shown that when you hear negative words, activity increases in the brain system that controls heart rate, breathing, metabolism, immune system and hormones. Dr. Lisa says: “The power of words is not a metaphor, it is in the wiring of your brain.”
What inner dialogue and what words do you say to yourself? Is it time to rewrite your own words? Turn your self-talk into a dear friend, not an angry road driver.
This technique is simple, it’s about creating self-love affirmations for yourself. It may seem silly at first, but imagine if you were that sweet friend – what kind and loving words would you use? Choose the words that resonate with you. If something doesn’t feel right, tweak it until you figure out what it does.
For example, I want to start my day with the affirmation: “I am calm, satisfied and confident.”
This could not find any resonance with you. So choose what you want to do.
Here are a few ideas:
• I give my best.
• Every day is a new day, a time for change.
• I give my best.
• I am unique. There is no one like me.
And when you get stuck, ask yourself, “I love myself because …?” Also, write down the affirmations to really give yourself that extra boost of love and certainty.
Finally, practice self-love as often as you can. Taking time to appreciate ourselves is something we can do every day, not just for Valentine’s Day.
Claire Aristides is a hypnotherapist, visualization & mindset consultant and founder of Mindology.App. After completing her Bachelor of Arts (Psychology), Claire entered the IT business world and started the successful jewelry brand Aristides Fine Jewels. Hypnosis has had a significant impact in both the business and personal areas of Claire’s life, and she shares this passion for hypnosis with her clients. Check out her work here and follow Claire on Instagram.
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